it's always hard to mediate. you try on both sides. you defend one person to the other. and you fight the other because of the first. you try to put it in such a way that both can accept each other. you dont tell the worst of the both. just so that, hopefully they will like each other and there will be peace. cuz you love them both and you want everything to work out. because they are both important to you. but ultimately, because of the things you dont tell, because of the things both dont see about the other, you are the one bearing the cost of it all. you become the one who is unreasonable, you become the one who is unfair, unfilial, unsatisfiable. in trying to protect them from each other's negatively coloured lenses, you fail to protect yourself. they see you through the negative lens instead. and there's nothing you can do. you build a web and you cant get out of the mess. you build a mess. so you have to live with it.